Sunday, May 23, 2004

I hate when other people e-mail:

5. Christmas blasts. You know those long letters that some people write at the end of the year and send to every person in their address books. Even worse, printing out the letters and enclosing them within Christmas cards. One of those cards with a picture of their whole family taken when they were at some beach resort last Summer. Lick a stamp on that and help keep the post office in business for another year.

4. Uni-paragraph messages. Have some style, damnit! At least, have mercy on my eyesight. It's not exactly easy to read a never-ending paragraph in this format, which is your boring life story since last Christmas because you were too busy to write me at any other time during the year.

3. A list of people who received the message. In theory, the idea of a paper trail is nice. Who cares about the e-paper trail. I certainly don't care who is in your address book AND I don't want to scroll through 2000 names before I get to the joke, which doesn't make me laugh anyway, but I'm gullible because you're a family member and I feel guilty. Learn how to delete information that is just stupid or useless. Aside from that, I don't exactly feel special. I don't feel like you really cared and took the time to write me a message even though the message said that someone was thinking about me and that I should also continue to forward it or my luck will end.

2. Forwarded jokes. And they don't even make me chuckle once quietly to myself when no one is looking. And someone already sent it to me two years ago. Nearly falls in the Junk-mail category, except it's done with more loving care by family members and the like.

1. Junk-mail. Are there foolproof filters out there? I thought I was fairly clever about it, but one thing or another always backfires. Something always gets accidentally dumped in my trash, so I always have to dig through my garbage e-mail to make sure the one message I received this year from my long lost friend from college who was only writing because he changed his e-mail address and was blasting everyone in his address book doesn't get thrown away.